I still have a hard time understanding that I actually won both Cykelvasan and the Swedish XCM Champs again!!
I had a difficult start to the 2021 season. I had participated in a few race, but I was really disappointed with my form and result, far below my usual level compared to my usual form.. I had many thoughts and questions as to why my form was so far below my normal level.
I went to Spain in May and rode the Andalucia bike race (5-day mtb stage race) and my results were not consistent, Irina and I got a stage victory on the prologue, the remaining stages we achieved a 3rd,2nd,4th ,5th and 2nd. A real mixed bag of results as normally I’m a very consistent rider. We ended up in a 3rd place overall which we were still happy with.
The next trip was to Italy and Switzerland, to race the Sella Ronda Hero in Italy (must be one of the most beautiful races in the world) and then the XCM European Champs in Evolene, Switzerland. These two races were at high altitude, with hour-long climbs, none of these are my strengths, yet I thought I should be able to perform a little better. In Italy, I was 12th and at the European Championships I was 14th, that was after the front shifter broke with 10 km left, but I probably only lost 2 places because of the mechanical.
The first race in Sweden was Fjällturen and again I was really disappointed with my form and how I felt during the race. I couldn’t believe that it was me. After that I made some changes in my training, and started to feel better and better week by week. As part of the training, I did 2 training races, one in Orust and then one in Älvdalen. The idea was to race as hard as possible without thinking about how I felt and rather enjoy it. Nothing more motivating than putting a number board on the bike. After each race I could feel some of my old self coming back. But I did not know if there would be enough time for my form to be good enough for Cykelvasan and Swedish Champs!
I was incredible nervous before Cykelvasan, Wednesday was a pure torture, just to being at home trying to relax and gather enough energy and mental readiness was really hard! The race was on Thursday starting at 16:15pm. Fortunately, I have my job to do, so I could try and focus on my work. On Thursday we would leave home at 12pm but at 11 am when Craig checked the air pressure of my tires, he noticed that we have put on a 2.35 width tire instead of my usual 2.2 width!!! It was a quick change of tires just before we left, a little stressful!
It was unusual to start at 16.15pm and to be at Cykelvasan with so few people around! Normally there are thousands of riders, all eager to beat their own time. There were many strong ladies this year and all had a great chance of winning the race, and I knew that it would be very tough to achieve a podium result, of course I hoped but nothing was certain, a win was never in mind, I thought it was completely impossible with the shape I had so far this year. Emma set a high pace up the first hill and I sat her wheel but I could feel that I couldn’t help with the pacing, I did a little towards the end of the climb. The first sprint prize I did not even think about, I always stayed upfront in the group as to not waste to much energy. It was a bit hectic in the group when we were on the forest sections and when the course was slightly narrower, everyone was fighting for positions.
It was a constant high speed, so as the race went on a few riders dropped off. But we were still a large bunch of ladies. I hadn’t participated in any sprint prizes until we came to Evertsberg. But in Evertsberg I was perfectly positioned so when we got to the last corner before the last straight I could not stay longer and went for it instead! I won the sprint and had a good gap! It was fun and gave me a little bit of confidence, maybe I still had a chance on a podium ....! It was tough in Lundbäcksbackarna when Nellie attacked up Oxbergsbacken but the gap was never so big that I thought she could stay away and soon the group was together again. There, we had lost Elisabeth (2019 Cykelvasan winner) who was dangerous in a sprint. When we approached the last sprint prize, I felt that I wanted to test my legs a little again and went for the sprint and opened a gap. It was nice and necessary to test the legs before the final sprint.
The pace was steady owards the end and we were 7 girls who would sprint for the podiums, we have never been to the finish line in such a large group. I started to feel that I wanted Emma's wheels through the last curve at the Wrath Museum (the finish had changed which I heard the night before at the team leader meeting, luckily they showed a picture of what it looked like, otherwise I would not have had a clue what was coming). Emma went first but I sat on her inside behind her to the left and I think it was Nellie next to me, the person next to me took the corner a little too wide and pushed me to the outside so I did not get out of the corner as I wanted and Emma had already opened up a gap. Instinctively I started to chase Emma and I definitely thought it was too early because I reached her right at the roundabout where you want to start your sprint in normal circumstances. Hildegunn had been sitting on my wheel and we passed Emma on each side of her, I looked to the side and saw Hildegunn start to sprint! It felt as though I must have gotten power from above and pulled the handlebars and pushed on the pedals as hard as I could. I felt my eyes blackening but I did not care I just felt I had to move forward! I did not even dare to put my arms up (probably could not either) because I was afraid that someone would pass me on the line but it turned out that I had a clear victory!
I could not believe that I actually won my 5th CykelVasa!!! How did that happen!???
Thanks to everyone who supported me in this and thanks to everyone who sent messages afterwards!!! It's really means so much!!!
We got home very late that evening and it was difficult to sleep after such a high emotion a few hours earlier.
Friday morning, I had a massage, packing and a drove to Trollhättan for this year's XCM SM which took place on Sunday.
I was really tired on Saturday and barely felt that I wanted to ride a bike, I think it took a lot out of my body as it was an evening race and then a travel day, but that's just my own theory. Towards the evening I started to feel better. It was another nervous day, sometimes I feel that I could stop cycling just because of the pre- race nerves and anxiety. But I know it's okay to be nervous;)
I felt a little nostalgic on Sunday morning because it was maybe my last hours as Swedish champion which I have been since 2013, I got a bonus year when there was no Swedish Championships last year, it's a long time! We started at 11.15 and it was basically the same girls who were at Cykelvasan. Except for Åsa who had not done CykelVasan and Sandra was missing since she was sick. I did not have much tactics other than to be as far to the front as possible on the first singletrack that came after only a few kilometres and then do everything I could so that I didn’t fall behind.
Åsa accelerated up the start climb and the field was stretched out and when we started to approach the first singletrack I managed to go in first. Further down the singletrack Emma said to me that she would pass and that I should follow her wheel, I have no problem sitting in 2nd position, so I let her pass. I looked back at the time but saw no one!! We had a gap right away! After that we just pushed, we both wanted to stay away! I had to work hard the first 45 minutes, Emma was really strong, and starts are always tough for me.
Then I got into the race and felt better, we raced really well together. On the second lap on the last singletrack I slipped and managed just not to crash, I got off the bike and had to get going again, Emma got a gap, it was only a few meters and then I fell again and Emma had suddenly disappeared, I had to work really hard to catch her again, which I finally did! I was a little nervous about the last 3 short climbs, I expected her to attack but she must also have been tired and we were approaching the finish together.
Emma went first before the last corner and then it was down to a flat out sprint again. I managed to win the sprint again!
I was so incredibly relieved to be able to wear my National kit and not have to delete the text on the car;)
This week really exceeded expectations and it is very nice to feel that the form is on its way back!
Thank you all for all the kind messages and all the support!! Now I look forward to the World Champs and Cape Epic in October, until then it will be training!